There’s a Vogue article making the rounds purporting the idea that “having a boyfriend is embarrassing.”
And honestly? It’s a fascinating mirror of where modern culture has gone.

Women have fought hard for autonomy — the right to earn our own money, buy our own homes, choose our paths, and not depend on anyone for survival. That freedom and power are worth celebrating.

Somewhere along the way here though, empowerment is getting tangled up with isolation.
We’re acting like the pursuit of love — especially heterosexual love in the Vogue article— is something to be ashamed of.

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The Independence Trap

We spent generations fighting for freedom, and now some corners of the internet are saying that being loved, partnered, or publicly happy is a bad look.

Why? Because we’ve mistaken independence for disconnection.

You can be whole and still want someone beside you.
You can post your relationship online and still know your worth.
You can build your own empire and still build a life with someone else.
You can choose to be single or in partnership, and neither is inherently better than the other.

That isn’t regression or dependency — it’s wisdom and maturity.

The real power move isn’t proving you don’t need anyone; it’s knowing you can choose love from wholeness, not fear.

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The Social Media Mirage

Let’s be honest — everything online has a degree of performance to it.
We curate, crop, caption. We want to look effortless while posting the highlights of life.

There’s this unspoken rule that life should appear perfectly polished — that vulnerability should be filtered out.

So now, some women fear that sharing their partners makes them look “less cool” or “less independent.”

If you’re posting your relationship for clout, that’s one thing. But if you’re posting because you’re genuinely happy — that’s called being human. And that’s what we need more of — not another perfectly edited perspective.

You don’t owe anyone an aesthetic of detachment or perfection.

If someone unfollows you because you’re in love? Those people weren’t your people.

I get it — I have had my share of “here’s the man I will love forever,” followed later by a quiet delete of posts… sigh. But so has everyone.

We’re all scared to be seen trying — to be seen living.

We have to normalize being human again — messy, evolving, real.
Men aren’t the enemy. Other people’s opinions do not dictate your life.

Only you know truly know your story, and you can’t control what others think.

What matters is creating space — online and off — where authenticity feels safe again.

The more we show up authentically, the more we give others permission to do the same.

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The Feminism Reset

Feminism was never about hating men. It was about freeing everyone from outdated roles — women who had to be perfect caregivers, and men who were told not to feel.

Healthy interdependence isn’t weakness. It’s humanity — intimacy, love, beauty, and magic.

This idea that “women don’t need men anymore” misses the point completely.

Men need women. Women need men. We need each other.
(Energetically, no matter your gender or orientation, we all need love and community).

We should celebrate the freedom women have today — to choose love, to choose solitude, to choose themselves.
Being single is beautiful. So is being in love. Let’s stop demonizing each other’s choices or how life unfolds.

Connection doesn’t cancel out self empowerment — it deepens it.
If love feels like control, conformity, or like a “watered down you” that’s not love — that’s misalignment.
Good love should feel like support, not suppression.

Love, partnership, friendship, community — these are human needs, not gendered flaws.

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Soft Doesn’t Mean Weak

Softness isn’t naivety. Being open-hearted in a cynical world is one of the strongest things you can do.

It’s easy to armor up and call it independence. It takes courage to keep showing up with your heart open, especially after you’ve been hurt.

You can hold your boundaries, chase your dreams, and still want to share your life with someone.

Vulnerability isn’t weakness — it’s real. And being real is where all true connection begins.

The Real Flex

Love isn’t embarrassing.
Settling for less than you deserve is.
Shrinking yourself to seem “cool” is.

The real flex is being secure — in yourself and your connections.
It’s posting your partner because you want to, not because you have to.
It’s letting people see your joy without apologizing for it.

Because the goal was never to need no one — it was to stop needing permission to love, rest, create, and be seen.

It’s the power to choose love — freely, fearlessly, and on your own terms.

At the end of the day, your love life and your feed are just reflections of perspective.
If you’re rooted in your truth, that’s worth far more than likes, opinions, or approval.

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We don’t need another divisive think-piece about how “embarrassing” love is, or bashing men, or men versus women, or how hopeless dating has become.

We need more people who are real, kind, and unafraid to care.
More people being themselves—and expressing their joy, unabashed.
More space for just being ourselves — in relationship or not.

Love — in any form — is what reminds us we’re alive.

So post. Don’t post.
Just do what your heart tells you. 💛